Couples Therapists Reveal The Dates They Wish More Couples Would Go On
In this HuffPost feature on therapist-recommended date ideas, Tara Gogolinski, LMFT, offered practical, research-informed ways couples can rebuild connection outside of the therapy room. She explained that the usual culprit behind couples drifting apart isn't a lack of time together, but the kind of time they're spending; daily logistics quietly crowding out the moments that actually build closeness. Tara introduced her concept of the "side-by-side date," where partners engage in a shared parallel activity like cooking, pottery, or hiking, noting that this format reduces threat responses while still creating a positive shared experience.
Tara also spoke to the deeper emotional skills beneath a good date, not just the activity itself. She shared her "What I Never Said" date, where each partner shares something they've always wanted to say while the other responds only with "thank you for telling me," and her "No Fixing Walk," where one partner speaks uninterrupted for ten minutes while the other listens without offering solutions. She emphasized that couples often default to fixing because they love their partner and want to rescue them from pain, but that feeling truly heard, without being redirected toward a solution, is one of the most bonding experiences two people can share. Her contribution highlighted that novelty alone isn't enough to reconnect couples, it has to be paired with emotional safety, which is what allows real intimacy to take root.